Friday, May 19, 2017

We Are Never Meeting In Real Life: Hopefully lesbian bed death is real

As I have mentioned a zillion times, books by funny ladies are my jaaaaaaaaam. So I was browsing NetGalley and saw this book, We Are Never Meeting in Real Life and, OK, I didn't actually recognize the author Samantha Irby. But the cover has an angry wet cat on it and it says it was by the author of the blog "bitches gotta eat" which was pretty much all I needed to at least give it a try. It was my lucky day, since I was approve for a copy in exchange for a review and here we are.

The book is a collection of essays about Samantha's life. It's not really a memoir, but of course, write what you know.

The first essay, "My Bachelorette Application" is a great start. It sets the tone for Irby's humor, especially if you aren't already familiar with her.
I am squeezed into my push-up bra and sparkly, ill-fitting dress. I've got the requisite sixteen coats of waterproof mascara, black eyeliner, and salmon-colored streaks of hastily applied self-tanner drying down the side of my neck. I'm sucking in my stomach, I've taken thirty-seven Imodium in case my irritable bowels have an adverse reaction to the bag of tacos I hid in my purse and ate in the bathroom while no one was looking, and I have been listening to Katy Perry really loudly in the limo on the way over here. I'm about to crush a beer can on my forehead. LET'S DO THIS, BRO.
I know that was long, but it's gold. And like I said that sets the tone. And really, I could repeat pretty much the whole thing here because it's all hilarious.

She is self-deprecating and vulgar, not the best with money when she has it (I want to be one of those people who feels satisfied when I pay my bills rather than cheated out of whatever frivolity was sacrificed in its place), and while she's never really touching and vulnerable, she doesn't shy away from some of the tougher parts of her life.

She has essays about sex, about her cat Helen Keller that she hates but also loves, about her weight, about growing up poor, about how leaving the house is overrated.

So if any of this sounds like your thing, and it should cos it's pretty great, I recommend. Clearly.

Gif rating
Title quote from location 2946

Irby, Samantha. We Are Never Meeting In Real Life. Vintage, 2017. NetGalley