They saw what they wanted to see, blind to the inconvenient, implacable truth

I know I'm roughly 100 years behind the times but I finally read Cuckoo's Calling by nudge nudge wink wink Gailbrath. I'm also roughly 100 years behind the times in terms of reviewing, since I read this back in October. Haha whoops

I feel like at this stage you've either already read it cos it's Rowling and gotta read her, or else you're in the "what is Rowling doing, this isn't HP" camp and you're not going to read this. I was in the middle. I wasn't going to rush out for it (obviously, given I just read it) but I also wasn't avoiding it. I didn't expect it to be HP like, not only because obviously the story is much different, but I also wasn't expecting to have the same connection to the characters or world. And I didn't. Which is fine cos I still had a good time with the story.

Overall I liked the story. I wanted to know what happened next, which is always key for a mystery. The characters were fun and well drawn and I wanted to spend time with them.

Cormoran Strike is a private investigator and in the mold of typical PI's he has his troubled past and his tumultuous love life and his connections and his ways of conducting his investigations that aren't necessarily by-the-book. There's also his temporary assistant, Robin, who has been placed with him because he forgot to cancel his work with the temp agency. He really can't afford an assistant right now (add to list of PI tropes), but keeps her on when an old friend shows up with a job. His sister, super model and general famous person Lulu Landry, is dead. Her death, a fall from the balcony of her apartment, is ruled a suicide but John Bristow believes otherwise and wants Strike to prove what happened.

This gives Rowling a case to do what Rowling does best, which is come up with lots of characters for Strike to meet. There are clues and epiphanies and red herrings and false starts and suspects and people with lots of secrets.

I won't give away more cos, you know, mystery. It wasn't a particularly profound story but it kept me guessing and I had a good time with it. And I'll probably pick up the other Cormoran books in the series.

Gif rating:

Title quote from page 80, location 868

Galbraith, Robert. The Cuckoo's Calling. Mulholland Books, 2013. Kindle

Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without love

This is it. The final Deathly Hallows post. I am out of tears. I've used them all up. Rowling, you have given me hours of entertainment and I Love the whole series, but right now, I hate you. This post is going to be a mess. Just an absolute train wreck. It's just going to be a lot of sobbing and yelling and pictures of hot Neville to help offset all of the sobbing. You've been warned.

Alice, you kick ass for hosting this readalong and there will be spoilers. And tears.

I'm so glad we've started this section with Neville being Neville and hugging people and so happy to see H/R/Hr. And we find out he's been raising hell at Hogwarts and is regularly getting tortured, but he's still so up beat, because he is the best, and I love him.

"'Thank you, Pomona,' said Professor McGonagall, and between the two witches there passed a grim look of understanding." And this is my new couple to ship, now that a Sirius/Lupin love would be awkward, given that Sirius is dead and all. Oh right, and Lupin is married with a kid. But it's mostly the dead thing.

Speaking of Lupin being married and all, we do not get nearly enough Tonks in the series. We get the slightest hints about her. She's so happy and cheerful when we first meet her. Then we have her anguish between being at Hogwarts to fight or staying at her mother's with her son. How the hell could she make that choice? Both of them suck. I addition to the whole Maurauder's prequel, I'd also like to request the events of the current story but told from the other characters' POVs.

DAMMIT, ROWLING, I TOLD YOU DON'T MAKE ME CRY ON THE TRAIN. Why did you have to kill Fred? Were there just too many Weasley's about? We could spare a few? I HATE YOU RIGHT NOW.

"That's right Harry...come on, think of something happy...."
"Something happy?" he said, his voice cracked.
"We're all still here," [Luna] whispered, "we're still fighting. Come on, now...."

Luna and Neville constantly make me tear up because they are both so brave and so amazing and UGH, they are the best. I fully agree that Luna could have talked Voldie out of his genocidal plans and into a career as a rare artifacts curator or something equally benign.

Harry is going to the Shrieking Shack to kill Nagini and Voldie is waiting for him, and then we find out Snape is there and that is it. That's the point that I quit listening to the book during my commute. I'm sorry, I can't be sobbing on the train, even if it would likely creep someone out enough that I'd get to sit down.

We see the dead lying in the Great Hall and I lose it, especially when we see both Tonks AND Lupin are dead and THAT'S NOT FAIR, WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DO THAT?

And then I cried all of the tears I had left while reading The Prince's Tale. Thanks for the dehydration, Rowling.

(Remember when we thought Snape was all super badass for being able to curse George's ear off, enough so that everyone thought he was still evil, but not enough to mortally injure the boy? Yeah, turns out Snape actually has lousy aim and George is just lucky he didn't get hit dead on.)

So I drank some water to, you know, re-hydrate, and Rowling ruined it all again when Harry pulls out the resurrection stone and asks his parents and Sirius and Lupin if it hurts to die and I CAN'T EVEN

Voldemort comes back to the castle with an apparently dead Harry and what does Neville do? He charges at him. He charges at him and yells his allegiance to Dumbledore's Army in the Dark Lord's face. Then immediately after being tortured by having his head lit on fire, he kills Nagini. Holy shit, Neville is the biggest badass.

pocket watch & everything

What to say about everything that happens after this? Apparently Harry did have all 3 Hallows for a little while, though someone else is going to have to explain the whole wand switching thing cos I missed it (I think diagrams will need to be involved). Then Harry beats Voldemort because OF COURSE he does, it would have been a lousy series if he didn't. Then we get the epilogue and just, I guess it was nice to see everyone happy, but I'm so sorry Albus Severus. I'm sure you can change your name when you get older. Maybe your mom will even get a say in what to call you this time around.

So until next week when we have our final Harry Potter readalong wrap-up post, wherein we'll gush about how this was the best readalong ever (because Siriusly), how sad we are that it's over, and I'll share all of the GIFs I collected specifically for this but didn't get a chance to use.

Side note, I decided to Google "death count for Harry Potter" to see what the totals are for the series and when I type in "death count" Google said "Oh do you mean WWII? 9/11? Some other actual tragedy?" and then I felt bad. STOP JUDGING ME, GOOGLE.

Title quote from page 722

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Scholastic, 2007

It's so unfair that you had to die, when you were so good and brave.

It's another Harry Potter Friday, after our BEA break last week. You guys, we're almost done with this readalong and I'm not ready for this to end. What will I do for my Friday posts??

Thanks Alice for hosting this potteralong and beware for there are spoilers.

I didn't write down any notes for this section. I kept thinking "Oh that's a good point. I should write it down so I don't forget." And then I proceeded to do whatever it was I decided was more important than following through with writing shit down.

Mostly this

So, let's see what I can do.

How bad did you feel for Xenophilius? I did not correctly remember this chapter at all. For whatever reason I was thinking Xeno tried to turn Harry over for selfish reasons that had nothing to do with the fact that his daughter had been kidnapped and was probably being tortured RIGHT NOW. I'm not saying I forgive him for calling the Death Eaters. I'm just saying he was between a rock and a hard place, and I don't know what I would have done.

I'm very happy Hermione let the DEs see Harry and therefore the odds that they'd kill Xeno are slightly less? I hope. I'm just generally happy Hermione is there for everything because seriously, Harry and Ron would be so lost without her.

Greyback making vague rape threats towards Hermione: DO NOT LIKE. Obviously I'm not supposed to like it, but maybe we could stick with just the Cruciatus curse?

The Taboo curse on Voldie's name is actually really clever. Good job, Death Eaters.

I don't know what it was, but I didn't cry during Dobby's death. I remember bawling the first time around. Maybe because I knew it was coming. Maybe because I was on the subway. But it didn't hit me like I thought it would. I didn't tear up until Dean and Ron jumped down to help Harry dig Dobby's grave. And then it sort of subsided until Luna spoke. Luna and Neville can always make me cry.

So, that blind and abused dragon guarding the Lestrange vault. There's no wizarding version of ASPCA, huh? They need some Sarah McLachlan guilt commercials.

I like Aberforth, that goat lover. I don't like that he's given up and is ready to give in to Voldemort's reign, but he helps out H/R/Hr. And he gives us more insight into Dumbledore's past. As with everything, it's not quite the rainbows and unicorns version that Elphias Doge told, and we all knew it wasn't like Skeeter's horrible rendition, but instead it falls somewhere in between. I enjoy these shades of gray.

NEVILLE IS BACK! And he is roaring with delight. Neville, you're the best. And thank you for ending this section on a (relatively) happy note.

Also this, because I'll never tire of looking at hot Neville

Until next week. I'm going to have to start stocking up on crying GIFs because no matter how many I have, there are not enough for what is coming.

Title quote from page 480

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Scholastic, 2007

The last enemy that shall be destroyed is death

Another Friday and we are making our way through part two of Deathly Hallows. Shit is getting real (realer), thank you Alice for hosting this thang, and beware, thar be spoilers.

Here's the thing I've found about this section: I don't remember a thing from my first read through. Which means I have a lot less random thoughts that make up the other book posts, because with those I already knew the plot so I could focus on the important stuff like wizarding plumbing and how bad at math Rowling is. This time though I realize the only thing I remember about this book is who dies (only out of the important characters) and the epilogue. Now I'm spending my reading/listening wonder what the hell is going to happen next.

I feel like this post is going to be Defend the Marauders-ish*. But whatever, here goes. Lupin is an asshole for wanting to go along with H/R/Hr and leave a pregnant Tonks with her family. He has reasons which aren't entirely selfish, but he's still a jerk for considering. That said, this isn't unforgivable especially because he doesn't go with H/R/Hr. Just as one good deed doesn't make up for a lifetime of being a shithead, and one asshole decision doesn't destroy a lifetime of being a kind and trustworthy person.

It's so nice to see Kreacher happy. Happy-ish. Obviously this is in large part to the fact that H/R/Hr are nice to him, but I think another equally large reason is he was able to tell the story of what happened to Regulus. Figure he's been carrying that around with him for years, but because Regulus said he couldn't tell any of the family he was never able to unburden himself. Hermione has always been nice to him, but it wasn't until he was able to tell what happened to Regulus and he got a little piece of his missing master that he quick being such an asshole. It doesn't mean Sirius & co were right to be jerks to him before, but I don't know that being super nice would have made quite that much of a difference.

The Ministry chapters were SO STRESSFUL.

Not only do you have H/R/Hr having to polyjuice** to try to steal the locket from Umbridge (who would never have it in the first place if MUNDUNGUS WASN'T SUCH A THIEVING ASSHOLE. Sorry, this section has me shouty. Because of the stress) but then they accidentally polyjuiced someone whose wife is being tried for being Muggleborn. The whole courtroom scene was terrible. It was terrible to know this was happening at all and terrible to know that H/R/Hr made it slightly worse for Mrs. Cattermole, since her husband wasn't there for her. Because they made him throw up so much it's a wonder he didn't die. Yes, they saved them in the end and that is what's important, but still. You realize not only how dangerous things are for them, but even without meaning to how they're putting other people in danger.

I like Phineas Nigellus (I think of him as Phinny. I assume he'd hate that. You know, if he were not fictional and all), ever since he told off Harry for being a pain in the ass when he was being a pain in the ass back in book five. I kinda like that they have him around, even if it's at least 50% arguing with him. Sure, maybe he's only showing up to talk to them and try to figure out where they are so he can tell Snape and Voldie can get them, but given his relationship with Dumbles I don't think so. And after all  he is giving them information about the goings on at Hogwarts. I don't understand why H/R/Hr (OK, let's be honest, just Hr cos you can't trust the others to come up with anything) don't have him ask questions and pass information to portrait Dumbles.

I had to re-listen to the Nagini attack at Godric's twice before I fully realized what was going on. How did I forget that whole scene? I thought Bathilda would have things to reveal about Dumble's and maybe even Harry's parent's pasts. That...that did not go as expected.

Could people please stop listening to Rita Skeeter after she's proven time and again that she writes just ridiculous and outright lies? I'm not even talking about people that haven't been directly attacked by Rita, but Harry, perhaps you have some insight into how much truth her writing contains.

A few thoughts about when Ron comes back, because that's the part I just finished listening to, and thus is fresh on my mind:
1. If Ron's reintroduction hadn't involved immediately saving Harry's life, you think we'd all be so happy to see him again? Cos I was super happy to see him again, but I feel like if he'd just shown up again my reaction would be been more Hermione-esque. Just seemed a bit manipulative, but of course JK is not above manipulating be via Ron. Remember Ron's poisoning last book.
2. When Ron's supposed to be destroying the horcrux and is instead standing there just listening to fake Harry and fake Hermione say mean things to him, how much did you want to strangle Ron? I couldn't help picture Harry sitting down in the snow going 'Oh for fuck's sake, if you're going to just stand there give me the damn sword." Maybe it's just the audiobook but this seemed to take forever.
3. How was Ron able to find Harry & Hermione? The Deluminator because magic. Shut up.

See you back here again in 2 weeks (BEA!) for more Deathly Hallows. I'm going to start stocking up on "I will never stop crying" GIFs in preparation.

*For others, please see any post regarding Sirius.
** Yes, I've verbed it.

Title quote from page 328

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Scholastic, 2007.

I don't think you're a waste of space

This is it. The last Harry Potter book. I probably remember this book the least other than there are a lot of sads to be had. Thanks Alice aka Reading Rambo for hosting this readalong beware of spoilers.

First thing. Ways Harry Potter is infiltrating my real life or how this readalong is affecting me: I was at Penn Station waiting for an NJ Transit train staring at this rotating iron works sculpture dealy they have in the waiting area. It's sort of a strange piece. There's a flying boat with beauty queens and a giant Mr. Peanut holding a tiny elephant. But that's not the part I focused on.* There's also a flying devil running on the same track as the boat, carrying a little man. I was trying to figure out why this would be part of the sculpture till I remembered the Jersey Devil is a thing, although I've never seen it portrayed like this one. Normally (because OF COURSE I have books on the subject) the Jersey Devil is described as hooved, head of a goat, with giant bat wings. Now, it's also described as walking on 2 legs, but I ignored this and thought to my self "Well, clearly the Jersey Devil is some offshoot species of thestral." Then I realized that I'm talking about fictional creatures and went back to staring at the board willing my track to show up already.

I took no notes while reading/listening this time around. Let's see if this makes the post any more or less coherent. Judging by my tangent above, I'm thinking less.

How bittersweet is it to see Harry unpacking his truck and getting ready for his journey? I mean, hooray because he gets to leave the Dursleys and never come back. But then leaving anywhere is sort of sad. And then of course we have Albus's obituary, in case you forgot that his death was sad. AND THEN Dudley tells  Harry that he doesn't think he's a waste of space. There could be hope for the boy yet. Of course if you were worried about things getting too sweet, then Vernon is there to continue being an asshat because some people don't change.

Then we have the Seven Potters and it's SO INTENSE. First Hedwig is killed and you want to be sad but there isn't enough time because EVERYTHING IS STILL HAPPENING. You don't have time to catch your breath before Voldemort shows up and of course he can fly without a broomstick, because picturing him having to ride a broomstick is hilarious.

Then, to keep the tension up, Harry and Hagrid make it to the Burrow fine, but we have to wait and see if everyone else makes it back. And of course they all don't because JK hates us and wants us to suffer. Was that not clear when she killed of Sirius and Dumbles? Frorge loses an ear and Mad Eye is gone and shit. We keep losing people that know what they're doing.

Ron's comments about the book Twelve Fail-Safe Ways to Charm Witches: "You'd be surprised, it's not all about wandwork, either." I expect everyone to have mentioned this line in their own posts. Not all about wandwork indeed.

Hey look, everyone figured out how to send messages using their Patronuses. (Patroni?) You know how else you can send message to people quickly and without owls? Phones. Just sayin', wizards.

The ministry has fallen and Scrimgeour is dead and everything gets SUPER INTENSE again. The wedding is broken up by a Death Eater attack and H/R/Hr flee to London. Of course Hermione is prepared for this and has their bags all packed already. Because she took Mad Eye's lesson of constant vigilance to heart.

Kreacher's story is touching and makes you feel bad for the poor house elf. I mean, he's still an asshole and still hates Mudbloods, but what a sad story. And of course we get the explanation of who RAB is (Regulus, which I'm pretty sure everyone guessed) and how he managed to switch the locket. You know that Kreacher loved Regulus, but you also see how much Regulus really cared for Kreacher. He could have made Kreacher drink the potion in the basin a second time so he could put the locket in there, but he didn't.

Again, I don't remember much about this book other than lots and lots of tears. I am afraid of what is coming. Rowling, please be nice.

*Well, not completely but I mean, how can you ignore giant Mr. Peanut & a tiny elephant on a boat full of Miss America's? Exactly, you can't. Which is why it's mentioned here even though it has nothing to do with the point I'm making.

Title quote from page 40

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. Scholastic, 2007.

Magic causes as much trouble as it cures

It's another Friday which means another Harry Potter day! This time though, we're taking a break from the normal Harry Potter series and reading The Tales of Beedle the Bard*. Which meant I had to go find a copy and the children's section of the bookstore is harder to navigate than I would have originally thought. Eventually I stumbled on the (giant, really obvious) shelf of all things Harry Potter, found a copy, and was on my way just before the bookstore closed. Because I do things last minute like that. I'm a little bummed it's hardback but I GUESS it's fine.

I guess there are spoilers in here, except it's for wizarding fairy tales, so yeah, you're fine. Thank you Alice for hosting this Potteralong.

I always have such a problem writing about collections of stories and I have been staring at the page for awhile trying to figure out what to write about. Do I write about each story? Just a couple? My overall thoughts? I really have no idea. and this isn't like the series where I have a billion thoughts and I sort of just takes notes as I go. But this book 100 pages with thick margins and big font and pictures, and I didn't have many notes to take. So let's see how this goes**

So, wizarding fairy tales you say.

I know Rowling mentions in the intro that the difference in these stories, unlike Muggle ones, is that magic is sometimes used for good. Which doesn't really seem right. I mean, consider Sleeping Beauty. Magic is what causes to her fall asleep for 100 years after pricking her finger on a spindle, but magic is also what keeps her alive, instead of dying when she pricks her finger. I suppose I point this out only to say that without changing things, I could see them showing up in any collection of fairy tales, Muggle or not.

"The Tale of the Three Brothers" is the best of the stories, which makes sense. I'm sure it's the one she put the most time into, given its importance in the last book. Maybe it's just because it's the last story but it's the one that felt the most natural. That felt most like a real fairy tale. And, I mean, it's the one Dumbles likes the most so OBVIOUSLY it's the best one.

I was also a fan of "The Fountain of Fair Fortune". I was going to say maybe there's something about sets of three, but then I forgot the Fountain includes that Knight. Even though he's just sort of there and doesn't really do much other than be nice and follow the witches around. Witches that also don't really do all that much. Except for Amata, who actually figured out what needed done when the water asked for treasures from the past. Otherwise the other witches just happened to cry and sweat in the appropriate place. And the knight actually tried something at each step. So I guess he's slightly more than just there. He tries, even if ultimately he can't get past any of the obstacles. I especially like Dumbles' notes at the end, especially the note about Lucius and how awful he's always been.

Dumbles' notes at the end of "The Wizard and the Hopping Pot" are the best part of this story, and I appreciate the explanation of wizard/Muggle relations. Or lack thereof. Plus it has the Umbridge-esque version by that Mrs. Bloxam lady.

I did not expect the ending to "The Warlock's Hairy Heart". I thought it would end with happiness and the warlock realizing the importance of love. I did not expect murder via heart stealing. The idea of the heart growing hair and turning into a beast I get, but I couldn't help but think of it as a moldy heart. That sort of took the edge off.

Now that I've written about all of the other stories, I may as well write about "Babbitty Rabbitty and Her Cackling Stump" even though overall I was sort of "meh" about it. I do like the that Babbitty tricked the King into not being such a douche AND she got them to erect a gold statue of her.

Hollywood version of Babbitty

*Every time I write the title I have to correct myself. I keep wanting to call it Tales of the Beedle Bard. I'm picturing a giant insect spinning yarns.

**Not long after writing that, my computer got a virus that I had to deal with. So. Yeah. That's how things went. Sorry if this post is short, but a lot of my writing time was spent cursing at my computer.

Title quote from page VII

Rowling, J.K. The Tales of Beedle the Bard. Scholastic, 2007.

Dumbledore's man through and through

Happy Harry Potter Friday! We've just finished Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince and shit is getting serious. As with every week, Alice, you kick ass for hosting this readalong and there are spoilers below so beware.

Ron's poisoning was a little "OMG HE'S GOING TO DIE...nope never mind, he's fine. Look, not even any damage." Not that I want Ron hurt, but just felt like a fake-out. I don't appreciate the manipulation.

How bad did you feel when Dumbledore is all disappointed in Harry for not getting Slughorn's memory? Disappointed Dumbles is SO MUCH WORSE than angry Snape.

I wonder how Harry is going to finally get the memory from Slughorn. I bet he'll come up with something really clever and...oh he'll just get him drunk and use his parents' death to guilt him into it. Right. Well. There you go.

Oh look, Harry and Ginny are officially going out. And again...

It still feels forced. Harry's crush on Cho didn't feel forced. It was adorable. This just feels like "Oh we're almost at the end of the series and Harry doesn't have a love interest, so let's fix that." But Ginny continues to kick ass, so I'm cool with seeing more of her.

Most of this book is its own story. However, from the time Harry gets the final summons from Dumbledore to the end of the book is pretty much Deathly Hallows: The Prologue. The other books obviously lead into each other, but they were all stand alone books. This one doesn't wrap up. It doesn't even end with Harry back at the Dursleys. It ends with H/R/Hr still at Hogwarts, planning to start their fetch quest that is the next book. I like the raising of the stakes and whatnot, but I sorta wish this had more of the wrap up the other books had.

We do learn the answer to a question I was very curious about back when we read Chamber of Secrets. What was Lucius hoping to accomplish by sneaking Tom Riddle's diary into Ginny's bag and did he know what it actually was? Dumbles tells us that no, he didn't know it was part of Voldie's soul, which is why he was so careless with it. However, he did know it would open the Chamber and was totally cool with murdering a bunch of children in order to get a wizard fired. Really, the fact that Malfoy had so much trouble murdering Dumbles is pretty admirable considering he was raised by someone who is pretty blase about killing. Of course maybe this is just because Malfoy had to come face to face with his victim while Lucius would have been pretty far removed, but still.

So Dumbledore is dead. Was I sad about this? Of course because I am human and have a soul. Was I as sad as I was with Sirius's death? Nope. Dumbles death for me:

Less this

More this

I'm still not sure why this is. Maybe because there's so much downtime to really let Sirius's death sink in, and that's when the sads really got to me. Dumbledore's death is surrounded by so much craziness and fighting that there isn't time to catch your breath and really wallow in the grief. I was less in shock this time around cos, you know, I knew it was coming. That said, Dumbles had all the answers and you knew things were ultimately going to be OK while he was around. Now he's not and now things are unknown and shit. I'm sure Dumbles is still Dumbling where ever he is.

Even into the beyond

Before this readalong, I didn't realize I was all for defending Fleur. To be honest, the only thing I really remembered about her in this book is she's bratty and says stuck up things, but then all is forgiven because she'll still marry Bill even though he's not as handsome anymore. But this time around I feel so bad for her. Does she still say bratty and stuck up things when she's at the Weasley's? Yup. Though given she's just learning English, I do give her some leeway because English is hard and she may not mean things to come out quite the way they do. Hermione and Ginny are talking about her behind her back and calling her names, which isn't that much better than calling her things to her face, and also doesn't mean she doesn't know about it. The Burrow isn't the biggest house and it wouldn't be too surprising if she had overheard them. We see that Mrs. Weasley didn't even make her a holiday sweater after making them for EVERYONE ELSE. So the ladies of HP, who I normally luuurve are acting really catty and this did not make me happy. Fleur's understandably hurt when Mrs. Weasley suggests Fleur won't want to marry Bill after his attack. She makes it clear that she knows, and has known, Mrs. Weasley doesn't want her to marry Bill. But she does it without insulting Mrs. Weasley, without pointing out how mean they've all been to her. Fleur's proud (she does push Mrs. Weasley out of the way, after all), but she's not cruel. She's far from my favorite character, but there's more to her than I thought the first time around. Go J.K. for putting so much into this minor character.

I can't believe we're almost done with this readalong. Next up The Tales of Beedle the Bard which I haven't actually read before so EXCITEMENT. Oh and to get us ready for the final book, here's a Cracked list (of course): 6 Questions The Last Harry Potter Book Had Better F#@king Answer

Title quote from page 765

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and The Half-Blood Prince. Bloomsbury, 2005

I knew I was different...I knew I was special

Another Friday, another Harry Potter post! And this time I'm back stateside so you'll get my normal incoherent ramblings. LUCKY YOU!

Thanks Alice for hosting this super-fun, gif-filled readalong and beware, there are spoilers ahead.

First thing, and I meant to say this in my last Half-Blood Prince post, but I forgot cos traveling. But anyway, for reasons my copy of HBP is the "adult version". As I've explained a couple times my HP collection is all weird and messed up, because I don't have a matching set so it was necessary that it doesn't match in a VERY SPECIFIC WAY. Since my second book was some weird mass-market paperback bought in Rome I needed the 6th book to also be a mass-market version. This is apparently really hard to find until I stumbled on a listing for the "adult version". Luckily, this just referred to the cover not being cartoony, and I didn't end up with some weird porn version of HBP. It's really just for adults who are self conscious about being seen reading a kid's book. Except HP is one of the most well-known book series out there, so these anxious adults are not fooling anyone.

Now, random incoherent thoughts!

Snape insulting Tonks's new Patronus -

Tell 'em, Snape. Wait, what?

See, anytime I start to think maybe Snape is kind of OK, and I cut him some slack for being sort of a jerk because of all he's been through, he does something like this and I hate him ten fold. It was bad enough him making fun of Hermione's teeth in front of the class. Now he's taunting Tonks about her depression, and his reference to her new Patronus means he KNOWS what's bugging her so much. Or at least thinks he knows, and either way, taunting her for this makes him a really terrible person
*Double spoiler, since this is about stuff that hasn't happened just yet*
So either he thinks the Patronus change is because she's sad her cousin was just murdered and Snape, are you seriously mourning the murder of a family member, even one you hated??? Or else he knows it's because of her feelings towards Remus and the danger he is in and again ARE YOU KIDDING ME???
*Extra spoiler stuff contained here. Normal spoiler stuff still below*

Does Dumbles know Parsletongue? When he and Harry venture into Ogden's memory a lot of what they hear is a conversation among the family spoken in Parsletongue, which I thought only Harry could understand. Did Harry break things down for Dumbles afterwards? Does Dumbles speak snake? Are memories subtitled? And building off that last one, if Ogden didn't speak Parsletongue and this is his memory, how they hell did he remember the hissing noises so exactly that Harry could understand it? I have lots of questions about the whole Pensieve concept. Apparently to the point that I'm missing all of the important information being told to us.

I was irrationally angry at Mundungus for stealing things from Grimmauld place. Then I laughed when Phinny got all offended when he found out. Not that a portrait can do much but maybe he'll make some really scathing remarks at the guy or something. I feel like that's what he'd do even if he were corporeal.

Dumbles was a red head. Did we know that already? Regardless, I'm happy to see so many of my people wandering around these books.

How creepy is the scene with the cursed necklace and Katie Bell? Poor Katie. Maybe this is why you don't accept packages from strangers.

So now we're getting the start of the Ginny/Harry pairing and...well...

I don't remember having any particular feelings about this the first time around. Now I picture Rowling going "I should really give Harry a love interest that doesn't spend a bunch of their time together crying. But who to choose? Oh, Ginny's been hanging out over there being awesome, so that works." I mean, it makes sense and I could see Harry falling for his BFFs little sis who helped him fight at the ministry. But the whole thing just feels like an afterthought. Not like the Hermione/Ron pairing which was CLEAR from the start. Those two are adorably bicker-y.

However, before we can really get to Hermione & Ron, we have to watch Ron & Lavender. Poor Hermione, although she should really quit being so mad at him. Except I don't know I can blame her too much, if only because Won-Won and Lavender are especially annoying. Also "snogging" is an excellent term that we need to adopt over here.

I feel so bad for Lupin in these scenes. I forgot what he was up to the whole time in this book. And I can picture him trying to talk the werewolves into joining Dumbledore. I'm sure things are going as well as they did when he was trying to keep James and Sirius in line when they were all at Hogwarts. Lupin needs a hug. And maybe someone to buy him some new robes for Christmas.

Stop fighting it

I came veeeeery close to liking Scrimgeour during the Christmas scene, until he made it clear he wasn't just trying to make Percy see his family (which makes no sense because why would he care if Percy is fighting with his family except that I just want everyone to be happy, dammit.) But it's especially pathetic that Umbridge is still working for the Ministry. She went clearly nuts in the end and there were plenty of people to act as an anti-character witness for her. How the hell does she still have any job, let alone with the Ministry?

So love potions are wizarding roofies, yes?

The Apparition instructor's name is Wilkie. That is all.

What was Slughorn hiding in his memory??? AND WHAT HAPPENED TO RON?? You're making it very hard to stop reading this week.

Title quote from page 321

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. Bloomsbury, 2005

Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince part 1. Still no title quote

Happy HP Friday, everyone. This is going to be another quick post as I’m still out of the country. I’m actually sitting in a bar in Galway typing this up right now. Or at least starting this post. Anyhooo

Thanks Alice for hosting this and thar be spoilers ahead.

So, I didn’t finish the reading this week. Or in my case, the listening. I think had I actually had the book itself instead of just the audio I may have finished it. I can listen to the audiobooks if I’m on the move, on a train or a plane or something. This week though I’ve had a lot less travel time, which means a lot less time to just sit and listen to the story. I’m doing well this week.

Also I’m still angry at JK at this point cos of the whole ending to OotP. Which is roughly how I remember the reading going the first time around. How was it for those that had to wait for the 6th book to come out? I read 3-7 straight through so I didn’t have any time in between to speculate about what would be happening or really come to terms with the (SUPER AMBIGUOUS I STILL DON’T BELIEVE IT) death of Sirius. Of course that does mean even this time around I get all choked up whenever Harry gets choked up about Sirius’s death and then everyone’s sad again.

But at least this time Dumbles has realized maybe keeping Harry in the dark is a bad idea and has started letting him in on details. Plus this means more scenes with Dumbles and I love the way he had the glasses of brandy? whiskey? whatever smacking the Dursleys in the head when he was hanging out there waiting for Harry to get packed.

Then they go try to talk Slug-man into coming out of retirement. I did like his disguise and also the fact that he's just breaking into random Muggles homes to hang out there, which is creepy. And he says pompous things about all the amazing people he has inspired, but it's nice to see a Slytherin that isn't awful to the core.

Back to the Burrow and we learn that Arthur's private nickname is Mollywobbles (or that's what it sounded like) and that's adorable.

Oh and Fleur's hanging out, saying awful things even though it doesn't sound like she means to and maybe the others should be a little nicer to her or maybe tell her to shut up a bit. Tell her to shut up nicely and maybe call her a berk a few times. Family relations, I will fix them.

Aaaand, that's as far as I've made it. Whoops. But I'll be all caught up for next week. Probable promises. Also I will be able to actually visit everyone else's blogs. I will dedicate Sunday to that. Or you know, I won't but I'll sure think about doing it.

There would normally be a quote here but I listened to this on audio so...

It was Harry Potter Friday! And I missed it, but let me briefly explain. See one, I am currently in Ireland (more specifically at the moment I'm in Northern Ireland, in Belfast) so that already was going to get in the way of this being a normal HP post. Second, I am SO SMART and decided to turn on that 2 step verification on my Google accounts. For those of you that don't know it, it means the first time you log in on a new machine, Google sends a verification code to your phone. You type that code in and you're good to go. You know, assuming you're not currently out of the country with a non-working cell phone. If you are well then SOL for you, isn't it? I had Boyfriend+ get into my account on one of the computers at home I've set as safe and disable that so I can be here. YOU SEE WHAT I DO FOR YOU GUYS. Also for me.

Anyway, onto the post, yes? (Thank you Alice for hosting and watch out for spoilers)

So normally I write down notes as I'm reading, and then I just sorta post that (hence the messy posts I've been putting out). This time I don't have any notes so this might be more coherent but will inevitably leave a whole bunch of stuff out.

There's a reason I've never made it past this book when re-reading the series. It's this stupid ending.

The whole time I was reading, remembering how great it was I knew this ending was just waiting, mocking me. It's like that Sesame Street book The Monster at the End of the Book, only instead of getting to the end and finding an adorable Grover, you find the death of Sirius and things are all sad and horrible, the end.

Oh but it's not the end cos then we watch Harry deal with the death and guilt and it's horrible again. DAMMIT JK, WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO US?

I didn't quite cry during these scenes. I was first on a plane, then a bus, so I tried to hold it together. I don't remember if I did the first time I read it either because it comes as such as surprise and then you're just in denial that he's gone because  JK decided to write the most ambiguous death scene ever. Which meant I pretty much spent the rest of the series until the end convinced he was going to come back. Did I mention I'm excellent at denial?

I should mention some of awesome scenes, because there are awesome scenes. (Even if I wanted to SCREAM at Harry the whole time he's insisting on going to the Ministry and If you had just bothered to practice Occulmency LIKE YOU SHOULD HAVE then maybe this wouldn't have happened. Oh look, I'm back to the bad parts. Dammit.) Neville, and Luna, and Ginny kick so much ass at the Ministry. They're so badass and so willing to help Harry and put themselves in danger. They rule. They just throw themselves into this thing full force. Even Luna who hasn't known Harry for years and Harry & co aren't even particularly nice to her. Yet she's still there in the thick of things because she's great.

I would say more but I am apparently holding up things. It seems some people want to use their time in a new country to go sight seeing or something like that.

The thing about growing up with Fred and George...is that you sort of start thinking anything is possible if you've got enough nerve.

Happy Harry Potter Day everyone! We're now up to part 3 of Harry Potter and The Order of the Phoenix and SO MUCH IS HAPPENING. First up

1. Thank you Alice for hosting this readalong
2. Thar be spoilers, so be prepared

Remember last week's post that was incoherent and an overall mess? Get ready for another one! But there are a BILLION things going on in this section so it can't be helped.

Hagrid's lesson on thestrals is very cool, except for the fact that the majority of the class can't actually see them. Perhaps more of the lesson should have been something the other students could have enjoyed. Or maybe he could have provided pictures or something

Uh oh, Sirius has been drinking alone. This can't be good. Is Lupin staying with him? He needs a roommate that is not Kreacher. I mean look how insanely happy he is when everyone gets to hang out for Christmas. Also was there any reason that even if Arthur hadn't been attacked that Harry couldn't have hung out there for the holidays?

Also his argument with the twins about why they can't go to St. Mungos was accurate if insensitive. The twins retort that he's not doing anything but staying safe at home was cruel but understandable. Thank you Rowling for giving us lots of grey area in good people being mean. It's a nice comparison to the constant awfulness of the Slytherins.

"'Doctors?' said Ron, looking startled. 'Those Muggle nutters that cut people up? Nah, they're healers.'"
Hey wizarding folks, maybe lay off of how awful you think Muggle doctors are, with their primitive healing methods. I guess you guys have all the normal diseases sorted out, so you just have to worry about magical maladies. Oh and way to share your secrets with the Muggle community. But I know, you guys don't want to be bothered by having the Muggles ask you for help all the time. Way better they just deal with shit like cancer on their own. This readalong is really making me think that, as a whole, wizards are jerks.

Ginny and Phineas yelling at Harry for getting all angsty again:

Phineas may be a jerk but he's right that maybe Harry should trust Dumbles, even if Dumbles won't let him in on every detail. And YES GINNY for reminding Harry that, oh yeah, Voldie actually possessed her too, so maybe quit playing the "No one knows what this is like" card.

"I didn't want anyone to talk to me," said Harry, who was feeling more and more nettled.

"Well, that was a bit stupid of you," said Ginny, "seeing as you don't know anyone but me who's been possessed by You-Know-Who, and I can tell you how it feels."

Harry remained quite still as the impact of these words hit him. Then he turned on the spot to face her.

"I forgot," he said.

"Lucky you," said Ginny coolly.  

 Scene with Neville at St. Mungos I HATE YOU. Quit making me tear up on the subway.

And MAN did I want Harry to just deck Ron during the whole thing.

Remember last week when we're all like "Hey wait, why does Hermione have a hard time saying 'Voldemort' given she's Muggle-born and all?" Well she apparently heard us and is completely over her sudden problem saying Voldie's name. Not only that, but she's getting all angry at other people who don't like saying it.

Harry's date with Cho is adorable, even if he ruins it by being a dumb boy. I remembered Cho being all lame and moody and weepy for no reason, but this time around I'm totally on her side. Sorry Harry, you are clueless and you clearly need Hermione there to lead you through basic human interactions. Except for her comment that Harry should have told Cho he thought Hermione was ugly. That was a stupid comment that plays into the "All girls are catty and hate each other" thing. Reassuring Cho that he actually wants to be on his date with her and NOT escape immediately to his friends is good. Insulting his friend to play into Hermione's assumed insecurities of Cho is bad.

So Lee Jordan got the same punishment that Harry did. Why isn't he telling anyone about this? I (sorta) get why Harry won't tell anyone, but Lee doesn't have any reason not to share. And if she's using her crazy quill on Lee and Harry, there's no reason to believe she's not doing this to other students as well. How are no teachers noticing this?

Ron, listen, you're going to need to stop suspecting Snape. I understand, he makes that as difficult as possible but you have been proven wrong over and over again. Maybe you just back off this theory.

That clever name for the DA club doesn't seem so clever now, does it? Except Dumbles seemed fine with it. Even when he's hexing people and fleeing from the law, he still Twinkles.

I really wish the students would get over the whole "points for our house" thing. You'd think at some point, like when Malfoy & co became part of the Inquisitorial Squad, that these things would stop mattering. Or maybe keep pretending you care around Malfoy so he just uses that to punish you. But given house points ultimately determine the decor for the final feast, maybe don't get so bent out of shape about them.

Harry seeing Snape's memory in the Pensieve: This is a pretty depressing scene. You see James and Sirius being assholes to Snape, who sucks but wasn't being a dick to them at the time and didn't deserve what James did to him. However, given that these are Snape's memories, I don't entirely trust them. Not saying that what happened to him didn't happen.Were the Marauders assholes as teenagers? Probably. Most teens are. Were they the super assholes Snape remembers them as? Maybe but since we're seeing this through a Snape filter, watching Snape's memory, probably not. This is probably why I can still heart Sirius despite this scene. Even Sirius admits they were "arrogant little berks"** and "a lot of people are idiots at the age of fifteen."

Related! That scene where Harry is talking to the remaining Marauders about their teenage behavior, I kept thinking about Megs comment on Sarah's post about Lupin and Sirius being the cutest couple. I may love Sirius but this is the couple I'm shipping. Even though I know how things turn out.
More Related! Jenny (once again) wrote an excellent defense of Sirius which you should read but she also points out that Lupin can't afford gifts and odds are the books from him and Sirius were probably bought by Sirius who just added Lupin's name to the tag. And this is just more evidence that these two are the cutest couple.

Also, there is a GREAT article about Snape's Anger over at MuggleNet that I found when someone* that everyone should read but BE WARNED it includes spoilers from the whole series.

*If this was you let me know and I'll update this post to give you credit.
**I assume this should be "arrogant little jerks" but you know what, let's embrace this typo and just write it out exactly as it's in my book. UPDATED cos my 3 seconds of internet searching yesterday didn't tell me this is a word. But you guys telling me it is plus 6 additional seconds of searching say "oh yeah it's a word and it kinda means 'cunt but in a friendly sort of way'" so now I find it twice as hilarious.

Title quote from page 655

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix. Scholastic, 2005.

I must not tell lies

Happy Harry Potter day! We've now read through chapter 20 of Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Thank you Alice for hosting this suuuper fun potteralong and be warned, there are spoilers ahead. I wrote down random thoughts as I was reading so be prepared for a not-at-all-coherent post.

Fred, George, and Lee trying out their sweets on the first years is not cool. Especially, if Harry is correct, that they didn't tell the kids that they were guinea pigs for essentially a medical experiment.

Hermione tricking the house elves into freedom is creepy too. It's one thing to want to set the house elves free (which I'm still sorta think is Hermione projecting her own wants and cultural understanding on others, even if freedom seems like it should be the way to go), but now she's tricking them. This also brings up lots of confusion how the whole "house elf freedom via clothes" things work.

First, the house elves aren't her responsibility. They work for/belong to Hogwarts, so shouldn't the clothes have to come from Dumbledore or at least one of the other professors? How can Hermione free elves that aren't under her command? In CoS, Lucius is the one that (unknowingly) gave Dobby the clothes. If it didn't have to be him, you'd have thought Harry would have just given him something earlier.

Second, these elves aren't being given clothes. They're just randomly finding them. Don't they have to be presented with clothes? I mean, we have tales of Kreacher snogging Sirius's dad's trousers in the last section, so it's not just picking up clothes that frees them. So even if Hermione could free elves by just giving them her hats, they would have to actually be given them, not just find them around, right? I am confused.

Hermione, quit being a bitch to Luna. She's amazing even if she is a bit spacey. And considering you're a witch you could believe in a little more whimsy. That said, Luna, I heart you but you're crazy. Perhaps don't believe in ALL THE THINGS

Umbridge is so awful, which I know, understatement. Her detention for Harry is so so terrible. I really wish Harry had gone all Bartleby the Scrivner on her and just "preferred not to" to his detention.Or you know, had gone to Dumbles or McGonagall about it cos WTF?

Or this

But then again, I understand why he doesn't go to anyone and just takes it. Well, I understand why he thinks this is what he has to do, even if it's dumb.

It was a dick thing for Sirius to make the "James woulda done it" comment to Harry. Is it worse than the stuff Harry's been snapping at people? Slightly, because Sirius is an adult but it's close*. It's childish sure, and something said when you're frustrated. And figure Sirius's frustration is probably at an all time high after the Daily Prophet story about how he's in London. And he's probably been hearing from others in the Order that he needs to stay inside EVEN HARDER than he has been. He probably figured Harry would think he should come out to visit, even if he wasn't actually going to do it. So yeah, he deserves to be smacked for the comment, but I still feel bad for the guy.

Why is Hermione having such a hard time saying Voldemort? I know this is supposed to be something to show how brave she's being by saying it, but it's not like she grew up knowing you're supposed to fear the guy. It makes sense for Ron and other students from magical families, or those that dealt with Voldie's rein the first time around to fear his name. Muggle-born students, though?

Good planning going to the Hog's Head instead of the Three Broomsticks for your secret meeting. Bad planning to think that just because there are no students around, you can speak freely. Even when you see suspicious characters all around the bar. I'm glad Mundungus was hanging around and hopefully would stop them if they were going to say anything someone around the bar REALLY shouldn't overhear. And glad Sirius told them to not do that again cos COME ON, Hermione. You should know better.

Harry's crush on Cho almost makes up for his angst. It's so cute.

"It would look suspicious if people from different Houses were seen crossing the Great Hall to talk to each other too often" - and this line makes me unreasonably sad. But really? It's THAT unusual for people in different houses to be friends? I'm thinking the hat is even more right in saying it's not such a great thing the students are split up.

I am coming to terms with the fact that I really don't care about the Quidditch stuff. I glaze over whenever these games come up. Just let's get through it so we can get back to the interesting stuff. Because when the rest of the story is all life and death, I don't care so much about a sporting match.

I also sorta glazed over during Hagrid's giant story, but I'm going to blame that on residual Quidditch glaze. But when Umbridge shows up and starts questioning Hagrid and is all suspicious about someone being there. She's very smart which makes her so much worse than the other villains Harry's tangled with.

I apologize because this post is a mess. And I don't know how to end it so

*Also Sirius is an adult who has spent most of his adult life in prison being psychologically tortured. Can we congratulate both Harry & Sirius for not turning into sociopaths? Because really, good job you guys. Color me impressed.

Title quote from page 266

Rowling, J.K. Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix. Scholastic, 2003.