HamAlong Post VIII The Finale: Best of Wives and Best of Women

Here we are, the last HamAlong post. I am equal parts

and

The second gif is not only for whole dying-in-a-duel-that-totally-didn't-need-to-happen thing, but I'm also a bit sad to be done with this book. I mean, my shoulder is pretty happy I'm not lugging the book around, and it will be nice to read something else for a change, but still.

Thank you Alice for hosting this thing and congrats to all those that made it through. And congrats to those that will make it through eventually. Or just read the cliff notes version via the various HamAlong posts. These chapters, 39-Epilogue, covers tracks "It's Quiet Uptown" (SOB) through "Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story" (spoiler, it's Eliza).

Every day proves to me more and more that this American world was not made for me.

Hamilton is not in a good place. He's depressed about Philip. He's depressed that everything he worked to do for America is being taken apart by Jefferson. He's depressed that people keep saying he's a monarchist. The man has a lot of problems and feels unwelcome in his country. Of course he deals with this by blaming foreigners and dude, what the hell? Stop saying foreigners are going to "corrupt the national spirit". DON'T FORGET FROM WHENCE YOU CAME, MAN. It's right in the intro song. Luckily people didn't seem to be following him but that does mean "Hamilton seemed to rage alone in the wilderness" and that can't have helped his depression.

General Hamilton did not oppose Mr. Burr because he was a democrat...but because HE HAD NO PRINCIPLE, either in morals or in politics. The sum and substance of his language was that no party could trust him.

Things weren't going super well for Burr either. I don't know that it's possible for Jefferson to dislike someone more than Hamilton, but Burr seemed to be getting up there, which is unfortunate seeing how he was the vice president and all. Burr was doing whatever he could (in between having sex with just ALL THE LADIES) to revive his career. However, Hamilton was doing what he could to keep Burr from winning political office in New York, claiming Burr doesn't stand for anything and can't be trusted. Which was not a unique opinion, but Hamilton being Hamilton made it loudly and often.

And thus we lay the foundation for the famous duel. The famous, stupid duel. Apparently dueling was what the social elite did. If someone was below you, you beat them with a cane. If you were equals you COULD sue them for libel, but that was gauche. Much better to SHOOT THEM IN THE FACE. #classy

In a shockingly brief span, the two men had moved to the brink of a duel and were ready to lay down their lives over an adjective.

The duel eventually came down to Burr asking Hamilton to apologize for making cruel remarks about him. To which Hamilton replied that he would have to be more specific about exactly which cruel things he'd like an apology for. Hamilton and Burr quibbled over the word despicable and how other people may have inferred something about Burr and really, is it Hamilton's fault if other people infer something?

One of the last speeches Hamilton made was about how terrible dueling was, but Hamilton was a "do as I say, not as I do" kind of guy and thus he wouldn't just give some bland apology to Burr but instead they went ahead with their plan to duel. Hamilton was, however, determined to throw away his shot. He told many people this though word never seemed to make it over to Burr, which is too bad cos things could have gone very differently otherwise.

Since these were busy men, the duel was scheduled for a few weeks in the future, rather than happening right away. Burr was having a fair amount of money trouble at this time and in a move of pretty spectacular chutzpah, Burr actually showed up on Hamilton's doorstep to ask for money.

And Hamilton helped him out, soliciting money from various sources and raising $10K.

You'd think this would have put SOME stop to the duel, but no, not at all. The men got their affairs in order, headed to New Jersey, and Burr shot Hamilton. The jerk.

Eliza had not allowed the children into their father's presence the previous day, but she now realized that the time had come for Hamilton to bid them farewell...[She] lined up all the seven children at the foot of the bed so that Hamilton could see them in one final tableau, a sight that rendered him speechless...He opened his eyes, gave them one look, and closed them again until they were taken away.

Not only Hamilton's family but the city mourned the death of Hamilton. Not everyone was sad he was gone. Jefferson, Madison, and Adams all seemed fine that he was now permanently out of their hair. And then there was Burr who seemed SUPER FINE with killing Hamilton. And it actually was ruled a murder, since Hamilton had thrown away his short and Burr shot him anyway.

Would have been a much better outcome

Burr was wanted in both New York and New Jersey, so he spent his time down south and later in Europe, avoiding charges. He kept his sense of humor. He continued to collect mistresses and told his daughter Theodosia "If any male friend of yours should be dying of ennui, recommend him to engage in a duel and a courtship at the same time."

I like musical Burr way more than real Burr. He seemed to regret what he did. And show various other human emotions

I heal all wounds but those which love hath made

It seemed that Eliza's world was falling apart, having lost her son, husband, sister and mother in rapid succession. But Eliza was a tough lady and she did everything she could to tell Hamilton's story. Oh and co-found an orphanage. And dine at the White House with friends like Dolly Madison. She also stayed defiantly pissed at James Monroe for the rest of her life. Oh sure, he tried to "sorry not sorry" to her about his whole bit with the Reynolds affair, but Eliza was having none of it, former president or no. She kept the memory of Hamilton alive.

And there we have the end of Hamilton and the end of Hamilton. I'm going to take a bit of a break from reading about the founding fathers, but I think I might need to read more about these fellas. And of course listen to the soundtrack 1000 more times.

HamAlong Post VII: Hamilton found it hard to refrain from vendettas

I know there's been a lot of Hamilton around here lately and, well, I'd apologize for that, but that's just ridiculous. Anyway, here's another #HamAlong post!

This week we cover off on chapters 32-38, which covers tracks "The Adams Administration" (we get more Adams anger, as well as Hamilton's open letter), hopping back to a bit more of "Non-Stop", jumping over to "The Election of 1800" and then backing up to "Blow Us All Away". Lin-Manuel took a lot of liberties with the timeline in the second half of the play.

Thank you Alice for organizing this and your Adams' love. Now, let's dive right in.

We're still in the midst of Adams' Administration and things are possibly getting even more tense between the surly president and the volatile Hamilton. Chernow says "During this melancholy time, the founding fathers appeared as all-too-fallible mortals" except, dude, where have you BEEN these last 400 pages? It is clear that the founding fathers were actually small children throwing temper tantrums and the fact that we managed to get anything done is a miracle. These men may have been geniuses, but don't worry, it was QUITE clear how fallible these guys were.

What someone should have done to the FFs

Given that Adams and Hamilton are on the same team, you'd think things would get better but they really need a common enemy and the Republicans realize this and are happy to sit back and watch the party implode. Except they are going to go out in a spectacular fashion. And by that I mean the Federalists are going to enact some truly terrible acts, including the Alien and Sedition Acts.

In between terrible, paranoid acts and building an army (only to disband it) Hamilton and Adams fought and fought and fought.

Hamilton was congenitally incapable of compromise. Rather than make peace with John Adams, he was ready, if necessary, to blow up the Federalist party and let Jefferson become president.

Hamilton decided "The Reynolds Pamphlet" was only the beginning of him writing terrible things in public that are going to destroy him. Reynolds certainly couldn't have helped him personally and now it's time to destroy himself, career-wise. Or as Chernow says.

[Hamilton] would be devoured by dislike of someone, brood about it, then yield to the catharsis of discharging his venom in print.

So Hamilton let's loose an open letter to Adams about how terrible he is. There actually was a song originally written about this for the play but they decided to cut it. Which is ridiculous because I love it and may have spent my long weekend memorizing the lyrics because I have a problem. Would you like to watch? Of course.

Through this section and the last, Chernow keeps talking about how he can't believe Hamilton made all these horrible choices and, listen, at some point you're going to have to realize that as awesome as Hamilton was in some aspects, he was an idiot in others. Like, a lot of others. Like the whole vendetta thing. And refusing to compromise. And writing down like every damn thought and publishing it for everyone to see. ("For a man of Hamilton's incomparable intellect, the pamphlet was a crazily botched job, an extended tantrum in print.") I wonder if things would have been better or worse if Laurens had lived and was right there with Hamilton.

This brings us to the Election of 1800 which was quite different from from the song. Also I was watching Drunk History, which just so HAPPENED to also include a section about this election, though focused on Adams and Jefferson and I get why Chernow didn't go into this (since Hamilton isn't mentioned at all) but like, this sounds hilarious and I was hoping there was something about it. Especially all the weird lies they were telling about each other in the press. Oh, would you like to watch that video too? Yes, good idea.

Jefferson gets elected and Hamilton does tell the delegates they should make sure Burr does not get made president but no one was asking for Hamilton's opinion. Which makes sense cos think about, when has anyone ever needed to solicit Hamilton's opinion from him. You're getting it, whether you like it or not. There's no mention of Burr being especially peeved about this move (and no duel yet) but Jefferson sure doesn't like the guy and does everything he can to keep the guy out of the Room Where It Happens

Do not piss off Tommy J.

At this point Hamilton is completely out of power, cos of said rap/pamphlet above, so he decides to move uptown and build himself a little house and garden. He asks friends for advice on gardening and of course can't help but make a comment about Jefferson

In this new situation, for which I am as little fitted as Jefferson [is] to guide the help of the U[nited] States, I come to you as an adept in rural science for instruction.

Can't stop, can ya, buddy?

Of course the feeling was mutual. As president, Jefferson tasked his new secretary of treasury to see where he could dismantle Hamilton's financial system. The guy tried, and also hated Hamilton so really wanted to take this thing apart, but couldn't. When asked what sort of fraud he was able to uncover, Gallatin answered

I have found the most perfect system ever formed. Any change that should be made it in would injure it. Hamilton made no blunders, committed no frauds. He did nothing wrong. 

When Madison later did allow the bank's charter to expire he almost broke America and ended up setting up a Second Bank of the United States, which prompted critics to say that he "out-Hamiltons Alexander Hamilton".

The section ends with Philip Hamilton and lest you thought the comment about how hot he was ("God, you're a fox!") was an exaggeration, take a gander at this:

Yeah, that's what I thought.

But he was just as rash as he father and equally bad at dueling. The Hamilton's didn't just lose their oldest son (who they replaced with the newest child, as Eliza was pregnant when Philip was killed. They named the new kid Philip as well and that seems like you're just setting your kid up for a complex) but also their daughter Angelica. She was still around and lived to her 70s, but she was very close to Philip and when he was killed something in her broke. She had a complete mental breakdown and had to be cared for for the rest of her life, often imagining Philip was still alive.

So on THAT depressing note, we end here. The end is near, both for this book and for Hamilton,  so that's sad (kinda) on both fronts. Till next week.

HamAlong Post VI: Hamilton would fight the whole party one by one

A day late but worth the wait (maybe, or not cos I'm pretty sure I'm still sleep deprived so who knows how this will actually turn out) here we are with post IV of our Hamalong covering chapters 27-31. On the tracks side, we're doubling back to cover "Washington On Your Side" through "The Adams Administration" and hopping over to "The Reynolds Pamphlet" (or maybe Burn*).

Thank you Alice for hosting this readalong, and all of your Adams' love. We need a counterpart to Chernow's HamFic.

After Alexander Hamilton left the Treasury Department, he lost the strong, restraining hand of George Washington and the invaluable sense of tact and proportion that went with it.

This section seems to be when Hamilton fights everyone. Everyone. 

Washington is all of Hamilton's impulse control.

Normally Hamilton focused his fighting spirit on Jefferson, but now he's hitting everyone over a trade treaty with England. First Hamilton tried to duel a guy Nicholson who claimed Hamilton tried to get out of an earlier duel. Then he declared "he would fight the whole party one by one" when debates started to get heated. Then he was going to do duel Maturin Livingston. Even Chernow can't believe this.

This was truly amazing behavior: Hamilton was prepared to descend into outright fisticuffs in the streets with his opponents, as if he were a common ruffian.

It cracks me up that young Hamilton did not seem to want to physically fight people nearly as often as getting-to-middle-aged Hamilton did. He didn't end up dueling Nicholson having getting him to sign an apology, and then he got Livingston to deny casting any "aspersions on his manhood or accuse him of cowardice." So Hamilton is basically Marty McFly.

Sit down, Marty

When he's not busy fighting people in the street, he's fighting John Adams, who is a member of the same party so you'd think there would at least be some common ground. Everything Hamilton did seemed to piss off Adams. He tried to make sure Jefferson wouldn't get elected and Adams saw this as taking votes away from him. Adams kept most of Washington's cabinet, who Hamilton was chummy with and they would solicit advice from him. Hamilton also provided a lot of advice to Adams, on the assumption that everyone always wants to hear what he has to say.

They do not, especially if they are curmudgeons like Adams who does NOT appreciate being told what to do.

Most of my knowledge of Adams comes from Chernow and I understand this is tainted and I should probably read something about Adams cos man, he comes off as a real ass here, at least where it comes to Hamilton. He called him, among other things, conceited, with morals like Franklin, engaging in incest (a lot of people seemed to think he was sleeping with Angelica which, I mean, I'm not saying they WERE but I understand the rumors), said he fobbed work off on others, that he was constantly on drugs, and really focused on the fact that Hamilton was not born in the states and was a bastard (Creole bastard, specifically). All of that would be one thing but then he also said shit like "I never wrote a line of slander against my bitterest enemy...nor encouraged it in any other."

Own your dickish behavior, sir.

While he's fighting with everyone, his affair with Maria Reynolds comes to light again. There were rumors that the money paid was hush money for an affair but in general people believed it was for speculation.

Hamilton could not have been stupid enough to pay hush money for sex, Callender alleged, so the money paid to James Reynolds had to involve illicit speculation. In fairness to Callender, it is baffling that Hamilton submitted to blackmail for so long.

Do not underestimate how stupid Hamilton could be. At least his Reynolds Pamphlet made slightly more sense since there was word that someone was going to start publishing a bunch of stuff about Hamilton engaging in speculation and other stuff Hamilton could not abide.

Once Callender's chargers were published, Hamilton faced an agonizing predicament: should he ignore the accusations as beneath his dignity or openly rebut them?

Several of Hamilton's friends recommended he stay silent. Because that is obviously the right answer. Except I think Hamilton is physically incapable of remaining silent. So what does he do?

Deaf to such advice, Hamilton decided to respond at length.

Because of course.

After that there's a bunch about Adams botching things, the US almost going to war with France cos of a failed ambassador field trip, Washington agreeing to come back to command troops if (and only if) Hamilton could be his second, which Adams was NOT having, while Hamilton spent a lot of time concerned with the outfits the soldiers would wear. Politics is weird, you guys.

And there we have it. I'm afraid for the next chapters cos just all the sad stuff is coming up and NO I DON'T WANT IT. Seriously, everyone just stop dueling. It's so stupid.

Till next week!

*I'm not sure if "Burn" should be included here or not, considering the whole point of "Burn" is Eliza taking her out of the narrative, which makes it difficult for her to be in this narrative. 

HamAlong post is a bit late

OK so I DON'T have my HamAlong post ready for today. I managed the reading but ran out of time to post. But I have a very good reason

SHOWTIME SHOWTIME

If you're wondering YES IT WAS AMAZING AND THE BEST THING EVER and I sort of want to get in line and try to get tickets again. And by sort of I mean I was looking up more tickets as I walked out of the show.

That wasn't the only reason the post didn't happen. Cos originally I was thinking whatever, I'll write something the next day. And then instead the next day I met up with some people to do Harry Potter (books) trivia. Which I thought the Potteralong would have helped with but there were 0 questions about wizarding plumbing or how bad at math Rowling is and instead it was all "This charm was muttered once by a tertiary character in the background WHAT WAS THAT CHARM, SPELLING COUNTS!" type thing.

HamAlong Post VI: Hamilton fights EVERYONE (yes, even more than before) will be coming. Just a bit late.

HamAlong Post V: Hamilton, the bare-knuckled polemicist

It's Thursday, so time time for more A.Ham. For those still caught up, HIGH FIVE! For those falling a bit behind because this is a lot to get to, HIGH FIVE. For those who gave up because omg so much government fighting and not enough Schuyler sisters, HIGH FIVE. High fives for everyone!

Extra high five to Alice for hosting this readalong.

Chapters 20-26 hop back to give us more info around "Say No To This" and Miss Maria Reynolds and then jumping ahead forward to bring us to "Washington On Your Side," then skipping over a couple tracks to hit "We Know." Getting complicated now.

This section seemed to be mostly Hamilton fighting Jefferson, Madison and pretty much every other person he met, getting caught sleeping with Maria Reynolds, and then more fighting with Jefferson and Madison cos of course. The two-party system was also starting to solidify, despite Washington trying to get everyone to just get along. Poor Washington needs a spa day or something cos these kids are driving him crazy.

Hamilton continues to defend the Constitution as the best possible government for an imperfect world.

Mr. Adams observed, "Purge that constitution of its corruption...and it would be the most perfect constitution ever devised by the wit of man." Hamilton paused and said, "Purge it of its corruption...and it would become an impracticable government. As it stands at present, with all its supposed defects, it is the most perfect government which ever existed. 

This is also around the point he realized that his old buddy Madison had gone over to the dark side Democratic Republicans and was SO HURT.

This was his Federalist buddy. How could it betray him like this? Hamilton needed his Laurens, but alas it was not to be. So Hamilton had to fight the good fight alone, or so Chernow makes it seem, though I'm sure there were others right there with him.

I know I've said this in previous posts, but the point that keeps being driven home is how politics does not seem to have changed. It's all infighting and propaganda from politically backed newspapers.

You'd think, what with all the in-fighting and writing rebuttals to the Jefferson-backed newspaper and general running a new country, he wouldn't have time to answer everyone who says something mean about him. You would be wrong. Hamilton never learned the valuable lesson "Don't feed the trolls" and responded to every accusation against his character.

A captive of his emotions, he revealed an irrepressible need to respond to attacks. Whenever he tried to suppress these emotions, they burst out and overwhelmed him.

Chernow's treatment of Maria Reynolds is not my favorite thing. He goes back and forth talking about how she was a crafty conwoman (who also couldn't help at least kind of falling in love with him, cos who wouldn't love Hamilton??) and a flighty, overly-emotional femme fatale. Most of the time he updates the spelling when quoting primary sources, but keeps Maria's original spelling. He says in the intro it's to "emphasize a distinctive voice" but it comes off like "make this chick look like an idiot even though spelling was RIDICULOUS in the past." We know Hamilton is his golden boy, but that doesn't mean anyone who was mean to him is evil. Calm down, mama bear.

Because the lives of Burr and Hamilton are intertwined in crazy ways, Maria Reynolds hired Burr as her lawyer when she decided to divorce her husband James. Now tell me a woman at this time divorcing her like abusive husband isn't bad ass.

America may have been having its problems, but France had its own drama going on, what with the whole revolution and Reign of Terror.

For Hamilton, the utopian revolutionaries in France had emphasized liberty to the exclusion of order, morality, religion, and property rights...He saw the chaos in France as a frightening portent of what could happen in America if the safeguards of order were stripped away by the love of liberty.

Hamilton's concerns in getting a stable government set up in America were validating by the horrors happening across the way. And luckily Lafayette and his wife and kids made it through the terror (though were thrown in prison under deplorable conditions), though his wife's family was not so lucky.

Jefferson and Hamilton again butted heads (what else is new) over how to handle the fighting in France and whether or not to provide aid. Jefferson said they had to help out since France is fighting for freedom which is what America is all about and Hamilton said they should stay away since things are getting pretty terror-y over there. Washington decided it was best for the new nation to remain neutral.

Jefferson was angry that Washington seemed to always agree with Hamilton. Chernow reiterates a few examples of Washington disagreeing with Hamilton to prove Washington didn't go along with ALL of Hamilton's plans, but it sort of comes off sounding ridiculous. I'm not saying Washington didn't differ from Hamilton at times on big issues, but Chernow makes it sound like "One time, Hamilton told Washington to wear a blue shirt and Washington went with a green one instead, SEE HE HARDLY LISTENED TO HAMILTON, SHUT UP JEFFERSON."

Chernow does this a few times. At one point a French expat who fled to Philly ("the French Noah's Ark") is quoted saying of Hamilton "He spoke French, but quite incorrectly" and then goes on to praise Hamilton for other characteristics. But Chernow holds onto that "Hamilton wasn't perfect" comment and immediately responds with "Nobody else ever faulted Hamilton's French."

One last thing, and then we're done for the week

Angelica wrote to Eliza and said

By my Amiable, you know that I mean your husband, for I love him very much, and if you were as generous as the old Romans, you would lend him to me for a little while.

I'm glad Eliza and Angelica had a good relationship and she could say stuff like this and the sisters didn't hate each other. Because that is pretty bold, Angelica. Though it also makes me laugh, and I love the song "Satisfied" so whatever, go you.

There are still a lot of pages left, so I foresee a lot more fighting and policy and financial history and while that's not my favorite stuff, I do have to congratulate Chernow on keeping things readable. Kudos there, sir.

Title quote from page 403

HamAlong Post IV: If politics is preeminently the art of compromise, then Hamilton was in some ways poorly suited for his job

Another week, another Hamilton post. And guess what! We're just over halfway through this monster (if you don't count all of the notes and citations in the back, that is. If you want to count that cos you plan on reading them well, whatever floats your boat. You're not quite halfway then.)

Thank you, Alice, for leading the way.

Chapters 15-19 still cover a little more of "Non-Stop" but we finally make it out of that track and all the way over to "The Room Where It Happened".

These chapters were like 75% about setting up complicated financial systems that would become the backbone of the nation and while it's all important and impressive that he did this, I only understood like a third of what was going on.

But let's start with Hamilton's first day as Secretary of Treasury, where Hamilton "installed an elegant mahogany desk with caryatids - female figures - carved into its spindly legs. A.Ham, you rake, you.

Hamilton does what he does, meaning he writes a TON, gets into the nitty-gritty of his job, to the point that he wanted to know all the details of his port wardens' lighthouses and buoys and made sure customs collectors sent him ship manifests so he knew exactly how much was coming in. He didn't take on the role of Secretary Treasury alone. As a matter of fact, he started his position pissing off his fellow Cabinet members by amassing a HUGE workforce under him. I assume he needed some help getting through all of those  ship manifests. Oh, and he also did the job of Secretary of State, since Jefferson was taking his time coming back to the States and accepting the position.

Hamilton wrote a 51-page pamphlet (I think we're being liberal with the term "pamphlet") to explain his financial plan involving government securities and bonds and other things that I really don't understand. Congress wouldn't let Hamilton present the plan himself, probably because they all remember the six-hour-with-no-break-for-lunch speech he previously gave. That said, Chernow still says that "it was so lengthy that, by the end [of the reading], many representatives sat there in stupefied silence."

That doesn't mean it was a BAD plan. Daniel Webster later talked about the plan and said:

The fabled birth of Minerva from the brain of Jove was hardly more sudden or more perfect than the financial system of the United States as it burst forth from the conception of Alexander Hamilton.

At the time people seemed split on if this was a work of GENIUS or if this was evidence that Hamilton was going to ruin the country and was probably the antichrist (or the "American Mephistopheles"). Because politics has literally always been like that, regardless of anyone talking about getting back to the Good Ol' Days.

Jefferson was especially not a fan of Hamilton's plan since Jefferson believed that they should be an agrarian society, like the simple life he and other Southern plantation owners lived, because Chernow gives us a Jefferson who completely lacks self-awareness.

Jefferson fancied himself a mere child of nature, simple, unaffected man, rather than what he really was: a grandee, gourmet, a hedonist, and a clever, ambitious politician.

Strangely enough for a large slaveholder, [Jefferson] thought that agriculture was egalitarian while manufacturing would produce a class-conscious society.

Jefferson, and increasingly Hamilton's former-congressional buddy Madison, were at odds with Hamilton and his financial plan and now we're seeing the beginning of that two-party system that Washington thought would be such a bad idea.

On thing I did not realize was Angelica's influence during the time. Jefferson and Angelica knew each other in Paris through Jefferson's 26-year old girlfriend Maria Cosway. Jefferson and Angelica flirted, with him even inviting her to Monticello or they could even take a trip to Niagara Falls. But given the animosity between Jefferson and Hamilton, Angelica had to chose and eventually she drifted away from Thomas.

Chernow starts to set the stage for Hamilton's later affair with Maria Reynolds. Or I guess continues to set the stage, since he had that comment about how he probably cheated cos Eliza was so busy RAISING THEIR FAMILY and I'm proud that we all called that out in the last post. Come on, Chernow.

This time he talks about how Hamilton was so driven he never took a break and this also probably contributed to his dalliances. I wish he was able to give reasons without making them sound like excuses for his behavior, especially since it was far from a one-time event.

Maria Reynolds comes off as sort of a crazy chick with wild mood swings and who had terrible grammar. She may have been afraid of her husband and looked to Hamilton for help. She may have played Hamilton from the beginning with the damsel in distress bit. Whatever the case, Hamilton paid the Reynolds to not tell anyone about the affair and tried to convince Eliza to extend her trip to Albany and ugh, Hamilton, I'm not a fan of yours right now.

I remember I wanted to talk about the Whiskey Rebellion but I can't find where in the chapters it is, but I kept thinking of Musical Jefferson's line

Look, when Britain taxed our tea, we got friskyImagine what gon’ happen when you try to tax our whiskey

Oh Hamilton, why didn't you listen? This section doesn't go too into detail about what happened with the Whisky Rebellion but Stuff You Missed in History Class has got you covered.

Even though I was talking about how we're just over halfway done, I still can't imagine what we're going to get into in the next 300 pages. Till next week.

Title quote from page 324

Chernow, Ron. Alexander Hamilton. Penguin, 2004.

HamAlong Post III Hamilton: a veritable Niagara of opinion

Here we are, three weeks into this HamAlong and I continue to be exhausted by everything Hamilton accomplished, including pissing off roughly every other person he met. Thank you, Alice, for hosting this readalong and making sure that we actually read this chunkster.

Last week's chapters covered tracks "A Winter's Ball" - "Non-Stop". This week we read chapters 10-14 which match up with...well still "Non-Stop". Man, that song covered a LOT of ground.

These chapters deal with Hamilton's burgeoning political career, but also are at the point where Chernow's rose colored glasses about the guy are unable to hide some of the less-than-awesome bits about Hamilton, such as his feelings on the ladies and in general being sort of a dick to people because while really smart, he never really mastered tact.

That Hamilton could be so sensitive to criticisms of himself and so insensitive to the effect his words had on others was a central mystery of his psyche.

Or he could just be kind of an asshole. ANYWAY

Chapter 10 starts with more about Hamilton's law practice including the fact that he would only represent clients if he believed they were innocent. Except one time when he defended a spinster with the logic that "Woman is weak and requires the protection of man"

This is how Mrs. Arnold was able to fool you, sir. I do not appreciate this and the fact that you would represent people who could only pay you with "barrels of ham" does not make up for it, despite how hilarious that image is in my head.

We also learn a bit about Aaron Burr who was essentially the exact opposite of Hamilton. He talked less, although it's hard to make the case he necessarily smiled more, especially if you look at the portrait of him a couple years before his death. Which might be my favorite picture in the collection the book provides, in large part because that is a painting, not a photograph, and thus he had to make that "Are you fucking kidding me, you done yet with this bullshit?" face for hours, possibly days. That looks like the face of a guy who "could store up silent grievances over extended periods." (John Adams was also described as "a man with an encyclopedic memory for slights." I'd say Hamilton has a real skill pissing off master grudge holders, except I'm pretty sure he pissed off everyone at some point that some percentage of them were bound to have long memories.) But Burr was a big fan of reading and called Mary Wollstonecraft's A Vindication of the Rights of Woman "a work of genius," so there's that.

In the contradiction that is Hamilton, and people in general, Hamilton joined the New York Manumission Society, which was a group of white guys fighting against slavery and for the rights of black people. Except a number of these people owned slaves, so what the hell?

I'd like to think if Laurens hadn't gotten shot like an idiot, he would have corrected this contradiction. I guess in a way it was nice of him to die before proving me wrong on that.

Hamilton then joined forces with future foe James Madison, brought together by their hatred of the Articles of the Confederation. What was wrong with the Articles? Well, to quote America (The Book): A Citizen's Guide to Democracy Inaction "Why did the Articles fail so completely? Most historians believe the Founding Fathers spent a great deal of their first constitutional convention drafting the Declaration of Independence and only realized on July Third that the Articles were also due."* I thought of this line pretty much any time the Articles were mentioned. It's a good thing Hamilton had a buddy in Madison, considering he was pissing off the other New York delegates who hated the idea of a more powerful centralized government, which Hamilton and his Federalist party was pulling for.

Hamilton to the Articles

Hamilton used his normal methods of persuasion, burying the opposition under a deluge of words. Oh he stayed quiet for a little while, hanging out on the sidelines, but eventually broke his silence "at epic length," even if it wasn't his most brilliant plan.

On Monday morning, June 18, the thirty-two-year-old prodigy rose first on the convention floor and in the stifling, poorly ventilated room he spoke and spoke and spoke. Before the day was through, he had given a six-hour speech (no break for lunch) that was brilliant, courageous, and, in retrospect, completely daft.

And that's from Chernow, Hamilton's official cheerleader. He didn't trust people to vote correctly ("His faith in Americans never quite matched his faith in America itself.") and he'd rather come up with his own plan than work off someone else's, and also SIX HOUR SPEECH, NO BREAK FOR FOOD.

Hamilton wasn't winning over everyone with his marathon speeches, so instead he teamed up with Madison and John Jay to write the Federalist Papers. They were supposed to be anonymously published and technically they were. However, Madison and Hamilton couldn't HELP but tell their heroes that it was all them.

Madison furnished Jefferson with the relevant names [of the authors] in code, while Hamilton sent Washington the book version and observed, "I presume you have understood that the writers...are chiefly Mr. Madison and myself, with some aid from Mr. Jay."

It wasn't all politics. I mean, it was mostly politics, but he also had time to flirt with Angelica when she came back to America to visit, prompting people to suggest there was something going on there, though it doesn't appear to have gone beyond flirting. And, since this is getting long, let's end with Peggy being great. At a fancy party, Angelica dropped her garter (which, is that a thing you can just drop? That seems scandalous.) and when Hamilton picked it up Angelica told him he wasn't Knight of the Garter. Peggy heard this comment and raised him "He would be a Knight of the Bedchamber, if he could." Can we get a follow up book that is just the Schuyler sisters being awesome and sassy?

Till next week, HamAlong-ers!

*America (The Book) also says The Constitution was named after Hamilton's mother. I have realized while reading Hamilton that an embarrassingly large chunk of my American history knowledge comes from the Daily Show. Also, I'm writing this while watching an Adam Ruins Everything about voting and yeah, good times.

Title quote from 225

Chernow, Ron. Alexander Hamilton. Penguin, 2004.

HamAlong Part II: Cold in my professions, warm in my friendships

Welcome back to another HamAlong post! Thank you Alice for hosting this and making sure we actually read this super crazy long book.

Part one of the book covered tracks 1-8 ("Alexander Hamilton" - "Right Hand Man"). This part is pretty much tracks 9-23 ("A Winter's Ball" - "Non-Stop") and holy shit we're pretty much through Act I and there are still like 600 pages left to go. For those not familiar with the Hamilton musical, seriously, fix that cos it is amazing. Anyway, these chapters seem to focus on Hamilton's love life. Or that was the part that I focused on. Naturally.

First up, we get more about Hamilton and Laurens' love for each other, as it seems they were both "rash and impetuous". The two of them exchanged letters with lines such as "I wish, my dear Laurens, it m[ight] be in my power by action rather than words [to] convince you that I love you."

But of course, Hamilton has a lot of love to give, and as the song says, Martha Washington named her "large, lascivious tomcat 'Hamilton'". Eventually Hamilton gets tired of flirting with everything with a pulse, decides he wants to settle down, and Eliza Schuyler steals his heart. Don't worry though, Hamilton assured Laurens that "In spite of Schuyler's black eyes, I have still a part for the public and another for you."

Hamilton doesn't just get Eliza, get gets the whole Schuyler family. Hamilton, who didn't have any family to speak of, was about to get three brothers (John, Philip and the wonderfully named Rensselaer) and four sisters (Angelica, Margarita (aka PEGGY), Cornelia, and to-be-born Catherine). I don't know much about the brothers, but the sisters seem awesome, not the least because all except Eliza eloped. Cornelia won whatever challenge the sisters clearly had going by "stealing off with a young man named Washington Morton by climbing down a rope ladder from her bedroom and fleeing in a waiting coach."

Of course, Hamilton may have married Eliza, but there's always her older sister Angelica who at this point was already married, or things may have turned out differently.

The attraction between Hamilton and Angelica was so potent and obvious that many people assumed they were lovers. At the very least, theirs was a friendship of unusual ardor, and it seems plausible that Hamilton would have proposed to Angelica, not Eliza, if the older sister had been eligible.

Will they ever be satisfied?

In between all this loving, Hamilton and Washington were fighting. Washington wouldn't give Hamilton the military position he so desired and Hamilton kept annoying Washington and indeed had become disillusioned with the man. But they kept their spat hidden to not upset the children. Eventually Washington gave in and gave Hamilton a command at Yorktown and he done good. He was given the task of taking over a redoubt and he and his men managed this in under 10 minutes. So that's pretty snazzy.

Things continue to look up as Eliza gives birth to their first child, son Philip. And Hamilton cannot stop going on about how awesome his son is including his "method of waving his hand that announces the future orator". Seven-month-old Philip had apparently already NAILED orator level hand waving. Or Hamilton is a ridiculous father who would totally flood your Facebook feed with pictures and stories about how awesome his kid is. "I'm sorry, are YOUR kid's eyes 'not only sprightly and expressive, but...full of benignity?' Yeah, that's what I thought."

Hamilton also did lots of very important government stuff, helping to quell some riots from soldiers who just want the pay they were promised for fighting for the country, figuring out a financial system and other important stuff. But instead of going into the details of that, I'm going to end this on a sad note and talk about Laurens' death.

Laurens continued to be "rash and impetuous" till the end, ignoring a command to NOT randomly attack a British expedition and was shot and killed. Hamilton never got his congressional Louise to his Thelma.

On a personal level, the loss was even more harrowing. Despite a large circle of admirers, Hamilton did not form deep friendships easily and never again revealed his interior life to another man as he had to Laurens. He became ever more voluble in his public life but somehow less introspective and revelatory in private. Henceforth, his confessional remarks were reserved for Eliza or Angelica Church. After the death of John Laurens, Hamilton shut off some compartment of his emotions and never reopened it.

As so I leave you until next week.

Title quote from page 123

Chernow, Ron. Alexander Hamilton. Penguin, 2004.

HamAlong Part I: Justice shall be done to the memory of my Hamilton

Here we are with post one of the Hamilton readalong (aka, Hamalong). Let's start with WHY I am reading a 800+ page biography of a founding father, despite the fact that biographies and US history are typically not my jam.

It's this guy's fault

Hamilton the musical. Obviously. It's amazing, and I'm sorry it took me way too long to listen to it while everyone was raving about it. This recent discovery meant for Christmas I received: a $10 bill, this biography we're going to be discussing, the soundtrack, AND tickets to see the show!

As I wasn't the only person to receive the book, and the fact that the book is massive and I require additional support to get through it, our fearless leader Alice (prompted by Tika of the genius ideas) decided to host this readalong. Because support of great people and gifs make everything better. Let's begin!

I was pretty happy to learn in these first chapters that Chernow has not written a super dry biography. Maybe because Hamilton's life was so dramatic, but still well done! Also well done that Chernow starts with Eliza and her work to tell Hamilton's story. AND THEN he moves onto Hamilton's mother Rachel, who is just as badass.

In [Rachel's] proud defiance of persecution, her mental toughness, and her willingness to court controversy, it is hard not to see a startling preview of her son's passionately willful behavior.

Now, in her proud defiance, leaving her shitty husband after he had her thrown in a dungeon (whaaat?), she did abandon her oldest child Peter, and that is pretty shitty of her. Chernow doesn't shy away from this point, but does reiterate said shittiness of Lavien.

So Hamilton's mom was not married to Hamilton's dad and thus Hamilton is a bastard at a time when that was a serious issue for upward mobility. Then Hamilton's father (OR WAS HE??) leaves him and his mom dies and the cousin he and his brother, James, are staying with commits suicide, his aunt, uncle and grandmother all die and everything is terrible. And thus we get Hamilton's work ethic:

From the outset, the young Hamilton had phenomenal stamina for sustained work: ambitious, orphaned boys do not enjoy the option of idleness.

Alexander was lucky to be taken in by a "well-respected merchant" Thomas Stevens. Alexander got along with Stevens' sons, and indeed the boys acted the same. And looked the same.

So perhaps Hamilton isn't Hamilton but is actually Stevens? Because of course there's extra drama and mystery in the guy's life. Who knows, but the point is Stevens helped out Alexander and not his brother James.

Alex gets work as a clerk and is given a surprising amount of power, considering his age and social standing, to make decisions on behalf of his bosses, Beekman and Cruger, telling them "I dun as hard as is proper," and I'm not entirely sure what that means but I like it all the same. You dun, Alexander, but not too much. Don't go overboard with the dunning. He knows the exact right amount.

Things are looking...not up, but at least better for Hamilton when there's a devastating hurricane, because of course. But since Hamilton knows how to take lemons and make a new form of government, he knows how to take a hurricane and use it as a jumping off point to get off the island via his writing. The merchants on the island decided they had to get this kid educated and Hamilton does not waste this opportunity.

When he gets to NY (after his ship almost sinks en route when the boat catches on fire, because of course it does) he meets

Who totally does need introduction cos history books tend not to mention this guy. But he seems to provide a lot of the information we have about Hamilton during this time period, so thanks for writing all this stuff down, Herc.

Hamilton begins his studies at Elizabethtown Academy, in preparation of getting into Princeton.

Never tentative about tackling new things and buoyed by a preternatural self-confidence, Hamilton proved a fantastically quick study. He often worked past midnight, curled up in his blanket, then awoke at dawn and paced the nearby burial ground, mumbling to himself as he memorized his lessons. (Hamilton's lifelong habit of talking sotto voce while pacing lent him an air of either inspiration or madness.)

In addition to studying and looking like a crazy person, he also likely met Burr at this time. Hamilton was also busy meeting important people and having impure thoughts about their daughters (or at least Kitty Livingston), in case you forgot that Hamilton is only about 17-19 at this time and teenage boys are always the same.

Hamilton didn't get into Princeton. Or rather his request to go through an accelerated program was denied, possibly due to James Madison. Instead he ended up at his safety school, King's College (now Columbia). And as with most college experiences, he starts going to rallies, which at this point are about how the colonies should tell parliament to fuck off (at this point some, including Hamilton, were still on the King's side). And at this point Hamilton really solidifies his key strategy for getting what he wants: burying the opposition under so many words that they can't get up again. Take that, Samuel Seabury.

Skipping ahead to the revolution (because OMG there's so much in these chapters) Hamilton makes a name for himself, eventually gaining the eye of George Washington, who made Hamilton one of his aide-de-camps, welcoming him into the Washington family, which it was actually called and that is adorable. And this was all a good thing for Hamilton, not only for the upward mobility but also because Hamilton could use some impulse control.

Washington possessed the outstanding judgement, sterling character, and clear sense of purpose needed to guide his sometimes wayward protege: he saw that the volatile Hamilton needed a steadying hand.

But Hamilton managed to keep his cool long enough to not only act as Washington's secretary, but also make decisions on his behalf and interpret his orders and wishes. He also meets John Laurens and the Marquis de Lafayette and Hamilton's grandson says "There was something about them rather suggestive of the three famous heroes of Dumas," and adorable? Adorable. There is also the fact that a few historians mentioned the possible homoerotic overtones between Hamilton and Laurens and Hamilton and Lafayette.

Because I've gone on long enough, let me just point out one last thing before ending this post. The section ends with a duel, where a guy gets shot through the mouth and out the back of the head and LIVES. What? How even? And the shooter's comment?

I have stopped the damned rascal's lying tongue at any rate.

These guys did NOT mess around with their duels.

It's insane that so much has already happened and we're, what, an eighth of the way through the book? Also I realized we're about 8 songs in, if we're measuring against the soundtrack. I'm exhausted thinking about everything Hamilton had already done. I'm also feeling super unproductive. Thanks a lot.

Till next week!

*I actually FINALLY listened to it because Alice had sent me a copy of the Lafayette bio by Sarah Vowell and I knew Lafayette was a character in Hamilton and yeah, it all spiraled out of control from there. So I guess I like bios of figures from American history more than I previously thought. I am terrible at knowing what I like.

Title quote from page 3

Chernow, Ron. Alexander Hamilton. Penguin, 2004.