Today Will Be Different: If everyone were so gung-ho on reality, there'd be no art

Have I made my love of Maria Semple's Where'd You Go, Bernadette? clear? Have I? If not, let me shout from the rooftops that I love this book and even just thinking about it makes me think I should probably re-read it again, despite a growing TBR list of all NEW things I could be experiencing.

So when I heard Semple had a new book out, Today Will Be Different, I said "YES PLEASE." Like, immediately, out loud to myself. Then I sort of forgot about it for a while because I am easily distracted. But I found an ecopy for sale and so decided to not only read it myself, but foist it on a bunch of other people by suggesting it for book club. And my book was chosen (at random from a bunch of pieces of paper in a hat) so the pressure is on.

...This was no Where'd You Go, Bernadette?.

Today Will Be Different follows around Eleanor Flood through her day, where she repeats the titular mantra. Listen, you don't have to repeat stuff like that if everything is awesome. But hey maybe today will be different. She'll do stuff like shower and get dressed. She'll only wear yoga clothes at yoga, which she will attend. She'll initiate sex with her husband. Today will be different.

But, her young son, who is having some trouble at school, decides to fake sick. This on the same day she discovers her husband, a well-known surgeon who treats famous athletes, has told his office that he's on vacation while telling his family he's at the office. And there's also the matter of her graphic novel, The Flood Girls, a memoir about her and her sister that is years overdue.

The present day bits all take place on this one day where Eleanor is trying to hold it together and figure out just what is going on. There are the flashbacks, some to her and her sister Ivy growing up, others involving her sister and an incident involving New Orleans high society.

The flashback bits were the most successful for me. They were the parts that reminded me of Bernadette that focused on the ridiculous. They were also the parts where the narrative made the most sense. Or maybe it was just he parts I could follow.

Because the thing is, the whole book has Semple's humor which can be biting a cruel at times, but is still pretty great. This quote is long but whatever, it's a good one and a good example of her writing

My point is: for ten years I haven't been able to shake her. She's the friend I don't like, the friend I don't know what she does for a living because I was too stultified to ask the first time and it would be rude to ask now (because I am not rude), the friend I can't be mean enough to so she gets the message (because I'm not mean), the friend to whom I keep saying no, no, no, yet she still chases me. She's like Parkinson's, you can't cure her, you can just manage the symptoms. For today, the lunch bell tolls. Please know that I'm aware lunch with a boring person is a boutique problem.

There were pieces and scenes and conversations I enjoyed but overall it didn't come together as a cohesive story. Part of me wonders what my thoughts would have been like had Bernadette not been a thing because it set up some high expectations.

But seriously, read Where'd You Go, Bernadette?

Gif rating:

Title quote from page 46

Semple, Maria. Today Will Be Different. Little Brown and Company, 2016.

I've moved to a state the neighbors Idaho. And any life that might still be left in me kind of goes poof

Have you read Where'd You Go, Bernadette? yet? Because please, don't make the same mistake I did and just skip over this book. I don't know why. I mostly remember skimming blog posts when I saw they were talking about this book. Nothing against this book in particular. I skim past a lot of blog posts if the book isn't one I recognize or doesn't include something that catches my eye. I think it was also the Franzen blurb on the cover that made me shy away from it. So not only did I not pick up the book but I didn't really know anything about it. Then Alice mentioned something about it taking place in Seattle and hey, I like Seattle. Plus I realized the whole I-don't-actually-know-anything-about-this-book bit and thought I'd look into it. And did you know the book is amazing? Because it is.

Where'd You Go, Bernadette? is an epistolary novel for the most part. There are sections of straight narrative but for the most part the story unfolds through a series of emails and letters and magazine articles and invoices for a guy that does blackberry abatement. Sometimes I like this style. Other times I wonder why the person writing the letter would spell out a bunch of stuff that the recipient OBVIOUSLY knows and would never actually put in a letter. This falls into the successful bucket because Maria Semple knows what she's doing. Plus I love that we get to see the story, or at least specific events, unfold from lots of different perspectives. Not just what do different characters see, but also how are they telling their audience? A private email between two people is much different than a blast email going to all of the parents of Galer Street School. And Semple manages to make the characters sound different. I wouldn't mistake an email from Bernadette for a note from Ollie-O or a memo from Soo-Lin.

So, the plot. Bernadette is mother to Bee, wife to Elgie, and that-crazy-lady to most of Seattle. She hates people and spends most of her time in the house, or better yet, in an airstream in the yard. She'd much rather have her virtual assistant*, Manjula located in India, do all of the basic day-to-day stuff. Since Bernadette and Elgie promised Bee she'd get whatever she wanted for her 8th grade graduation if she got straight A's (or straight S's for Surpasses Excellence because Galer St doesn't do traditional grades. I guess it's better than a crocodile for spelling.) she could have whatever she wanted. And she wants a trip to Antarctica. Bernadette may be dreading the trip with every inch of herself but she promised this to Bee, and Bernadette is nothing if not a devoted parent.

But of course we have the title of the book so you probably realized things don't go as they were intended and Bernadette disappears. Again. I don't want to say too much. I don't want to spoil anything. I went into the book pretty much knowing it's told through letters and takes place in Seattle and that's it. I don't know if it would have made a difference to know more but I know I loved every new plot point. I don't think I could have anticipated a single one.**

Did I mention the book is funny? Because it's hilarious. I guess it helps that Semple was a writer for Mad About You and Arrested Development and, OK, the fact that she wrote for AD helped convince me that I should really pick this up. I started the book while I was at a beach house with some friends and I kept making them read a line here or there because Bernadette is the best. Even when she is railing on how much she HATES Seattle and Canadians. Her rambling emails to Manjula were some of my favorites.

I can't say enough good things about this book. As soon as I finished it I wanted to start it again. I may read it again soon. You should read it. Now. Right now. Are you reading it yet?

*These are totally a real thing. I would have laughed at the idea and assumed it was something made up because it's too ridiculous except I read about them in My Life as an Experiment by A. J. Jacobs. So yeah. It's a thing.
**I tend NOT to guess things that are going to happen in a book/movie/tv show so take this with a grain of salt.

Title quote from page 127
I had another quote I wanted to use and I went back and forth about it but it's sooorta maybe spoilery so I left it out. I'm telling you this cos about 60% of my time spent writing this post was figuring out a title quote. I really need to start writing these down as I'm reading

Semple, Maria. Where'd You Go, Bernadette? Back Bay Books, 2012